GMZ

GMZ #11 – Link’s Album, Vince Zampella Interview, & Pensacon Report

[Author Note: Many may react with disdain toward our (and by that, we totally mean Daniel’s) method of covering Pensacon. We understand that we may look rather silly, or worse, disrespectful toward honest convention goers and participants in of an honest and good event like Pensacon, but in reality, we were just trying to have some fun with our job, and also trying to goof around with some of the attendees, and maybe try to make them laugh a little.

We sincerely (and, unlike most of the time when we say that word, we do actually mean it this time) apologize if our presence at the convention bothered any of the other con-goers (we don’t actually know if anyone is upset, but we figured it wouldn’t be far-fetched). As well, we’d like to thank Pensacon for so graciously granting us Media Badges to attend their convention, and we would love to be able to come back next year (and apparently we aren’t the only ones, as Pensacon’s press release states “98% of the attendees interviewed said they planned to return.” Well done!).

So, in conclusion, thank you Staff of Pensacon, Pensacon Attendees and Guests, and anybody in the larger Pensacola area, for tolerating our crap.]

Link’s Spoken Word Album Name and Track Listing Leaked

By Lester Bangs

Despite his recent spate of bad press and the fact that he’s been brought to court on charges of sexual harrasment (among others), Link has said he’s been hard at work on a spoken word album. Not much was known about the album until we were contacted by one of our music industry sources who just this morning sent us the track list and album name. If you thought he couldn’t sink any lower, prepared to be surprised. The album name, chosen by a person charged with sexual harrasment and assault, is “TRY FORCE.” In what appears to be a two-pronged  attempt to dethrone Chris Brown as reigning monarch of the Piece of Shit Assholes kingdom, Link also seems to have gotten a tattoo.

Link Tattoo

Anyway, here’s the track listing:

1 – Hyah

2 – Parapa’s Delight

3 – Try Force

4 – Kokiri on the Moon

5 – Boats and Hoes

6 – The Mogma, The Zora, and The Boomerang Dealer (Feat. the Shaolin Style Wu-Tang Clan)

7 – Bit Please

8 – Everybody’s Free (to Wear a Goron Tunic)

9 – Sheathing My Sword (A Love Song, Feat. Dry Bone Thugs-n-Harmony)

10 – Gerudo Love

11 – Three Eye Rap (DJ Skull Kid remix)

12 – Subrosian’s Got Back (Feat. MC Tingle)

13 – Ain’t Nuttin’ But a Z Thang

14 – The Revolution Will Not Be Gossip Stoned

15 – Move Bit (Get Out the Way)

 

Exclusive Interview: Vince Zampella Talks Titanfall

By Cynthia Caster

We got a chance to catch up with Infinity Ward cofounded and former CEO, Vince Zampella, the man behind the Call of Duty franchise, to talk about his newest company’s (Respawn Entertainment) first game, Titanfall, which launched the week.

GMZ – Good evening Mr. Zampella. Thank you for agreeing to sit down with me.

Vince – It’s my pleasure. I’m actually a huge fan of GMZ. I find your work arousingly informative and extremely important.

GMZ – Ooook… uh, tell us about this new game of yours, Towerfall. I believe it’s digital version of Jenga, but with mechs and jetpacks.

Vince – Uhhhhhhhh…

GMZ – How did you come up with the idea for the game? Office Jenga party combined with a love of GTA San Andreas? Also, why didn’t you call it Jetpack Jenga? HASBRO wouldn’t give the licencing rights?

Vince – Listen, as much as I am kind of curious about your bizarre Jenga game, I think you’re confused. My game is called Titanfall and I came up with the idea while playing a very old game.

GMZ – Connect Four? Oh man, your next game should be called Kinect Four! And it should have mechs and jetpacks!!!

Vince – What is wrong with you?

GMZ – *Makes sad puppy dog eyes*

Vince – Aww, I can’t stay mad at that face. The game I was playing was Blaster Master. While playing it, I thought to myself how great the game could be if it was redone to not be kind of terrible.

Like, what if the game allowed you to save and continue later? A Metroidvania-style game (before the genre even existed) that forces you to beat it from start to finish in one shot? That’s just stupid!

What if, like Contra and Metroid, the game had several other weapons that weren’t terrible and practically useless? What if-

GMZ – … it had mechs and jetpacks?

Vince – Well, you did have SOPHIA THE THIRD, your tank, but yeah, we took the wheels off and allowed you to shoot at more than three angles. Same as with Jason, I mean, he couldn’t even jump during the top-down sequences and he was virtually useless when outside of his tank for the 2d sections. So, we gave him a jetpack and made him less lame.

We haven’t done anything revolutionary. We just wanted to make a fun game like the ones we played as a kid, know what I mean?

GMZ – Huh? Uhm sorry. I stopped listening a little while ago. I was drawing this instead:

Jengafall

Vince – Oh wow! That looks awesome and I totally want Respawn to make this. I think we should head up to my hotel room to discuss it some more.

GMZ – Look, I’m flattered, but I’m married.

Vince – That’s cool, you can invite him or her too. The more the merrier, I always say.

GMZ – Ok then. I’ll bring some alginate.

GMZ On Location: Pensacon

By Daniel Lamplugh

GMZ reporter and co-founder Daniel Lamplugh takes to Pensacon to get the insightful opinions of our informed populace.