The Retro Critic

The Adventures Of Gilligan’s Island

Come on, don’t look surprised.

I was BORN to review this!

Now, this might be a controversial review seeing as the common consensus on this game is pretty much that it is terrible and should be stored next to the Ark of the Covenant far away in a big dusty box somewhere. This includes our very own Nintendo Legend who understandably destroyed The Adventures Of Gilligan’s Island (aka Gilligan’s Island) in his review some time ago.

The fact that I kinda like this game in a weird way may possibly make me look insane but also, I think, raises some interesting retro gaming questions: Can a well-meaning game adaptation which captures the spirit of its source material relatively well still be considered a complete failure even if it is extremely flawed? And what should our expectations be when dealing with a TV or film-to-game adaptation so ludicrous in concept that it doesn’t even sound like a real thing that should exist?

Looking back at my The Three Stooges game review, I realise this may sound like something of a contradiction since I did conclude that that particular game was pretty bad but, in retrospect, it was SO out-of-its-mind that it admittedly ended up being a lot of fun and captured the anarchic nature of the classic trio rather well. The idea of a Three Stooges game was so ridiculous that my expectations weren’t that high to begin with. In fact, I welcomed whatever madness the game had to offer me!

I expected something wacky and that’s what I got, though it also happened to be horribly programmed and awkward as hell to control…

With the NES’s Gilligan’s Island, here we have a game which takes a silly island-set sitcom from the 60’s and turns it into an 8-bit adventure dipping its toe into side-scrolling and RPG territory. Why does this game exist? Your guess is as good as mine but from the get-go, it’s obvious that someone involved must have had some affection for the show: the jokes, plot points and character dynamics feeling familiar throughout.

I mean, check out this very first joke:

Awful, awful joke.

I think we can all agree?

Still, it’s charmingly awful and I do appreciate a good bad joke, especially when starting off an NES game I’m almost 100% sure is going to be a madcap creation. Besides, not expecting bad jokes when dealing with anything Gilligan’s Island related is almost a faux-pas at this point.

We’re introduced to our main characters straight away:

And the rest.

You then play through four levels/episodes which each offer different plot threads, the first of which being centered around everyone building a hut.

Sounds simple enough, right?

Well, think again: turns out the game takes the idea of the side-quest and balloons it up to a whole new level. The entire game IS a side-quest where all you’re doing is getting distracted, going from one person to the next in order to finally do the first thing you set out to do.

It gets pretty convoluted about a minute in.

I crossed the entire jungle just for that little titbit of enlightening information?!

Thank you, “Professor.”

IF that is your real name.

You control Skipper throughout the game and Gilligan basically follows you around like a computer-controlled puppet. He’s impressively useless and even runs away or tries to hide during boss battles!

To be fair though, I don’t see Gilligan really being all that helpful when faced with this situation in the show.

By the way, so you’re fighting this very annoyed ape and when you finally beat him, guess what he turns into.

Give up?

That’s right: a chest.

Because THAT totally happens!

Along the way you can pick up some life or some time bonuses. Now the sound effects are great in this game but I’ll never understand why picking up more time sounds like you’ve done something wrong. This oddly negative buzzer sound rings and you feel like you’ve made some kind of mistake when really, all you’ve done is extend your play: a good thing.

Otherwise, in the sound department I have no complaints and the 8-bit rendition of the classic Gilligan’s Island theme song is actually really good and should put you in the right mood from the get-go.

Of course, walking in the jungle comes with its share of obstacles from jumping monkeys:

To giant pieces of Nesquik cereal and killer birds:

To wild pigs who can (and will) run you over:

To… leopards?

And eventually other people but we’ll get to that in a minute.

First, let’s talk about the dialogs which pop up as text all over the game in cut scenes and during gameplay.

They.

Are.

Wonderful.

And I mean this both sarcastically and legitimately.

Some of it is so annoying, repetitive and intrusive, so bad, it’s humorous. The fact that Skipper and Gilligan keep having the same conversation again and again is really irritating but, at the same time, it’s easily skippable.

Then there’s parts in which the dialogs simply sound random:

Especially when completely taken out of context!

lol

Oh, in this one, Skipper sounds angry and looks like he’s about to beat Mary Ann into making him food:

Is this Gilligan’s Island or Hannibal?!

A question you’ve no doubt asked yourself countless times over the years.

So anyway, you somehow end up under some river where you start fighting some natives who have never hurt you in any way with your mighty Popeye-like arms and caveman-style mallets.

It’s an odd part of the game but, knowing what comes later, it’s pretty tame, believe me.

To update you on the whole hut-building scenario, by the way, they built it on the water and Gilligan is left to look at things on the bright side.

That’s what Jack said in Lost and look where that got him.

Off the island, then back to the island, then back in time, then forward in time, then sideways in parallel time, then… wherever the finale happened.

Lost is awesome, I could just be re-watching that instead of making an outlandish, positive case for this silly game.

Eventually, events develop in a certain way and you end up fighting a skeleton. Now, the Harlem Globetrotters showing up on the island was pretty goofy, I’ll admit, but now we’re in Jason and the Argonauts territory and this scares me. As does Gilligan’s position in the next screenshot which reminds me of the ending to The Blair Witch Project.

This guy’s not exactly easy to beat either!

Gilligan’s no help, as usual, and killing the dead proves to be just as time-consuming and as tricky as you’d expect.

Skipping slightly to the end, the crew end up with one wish to make which could be their last hope of finally leaving the island when Gilligan intervenes:

I guess they had to end on another bad joke since they started off with one!

Now either the game is encouraging you to go and watch the show, which is highly unlikely seeing as, by that point, it was already pretty old. Or, the game thinks it’s getting a sequel, which is just comical.

I can’t say that this Gilligan’s Island game is particularly good seeing as its plot threads are distractingly unbalanced and it’s often repetitive but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy playing it to a certain extent. While not particularly a fan of the show, I appreciated the game’s attempts at trying something a bit different gameplay-wise and injecting some humour to the proceedings.

Much like that Monty Python game or the Three Stooges game, this one’s no masterpiece and it’s a pain in the neck at times (lame password features, Gilligan getting stuck all the time…) but there’s definitely a charm to it and, by the end, you do feel like you’ve played a Gilligan’s Island game and that’s really all we could have hoped for this one.

If you like the show, you’ll probably enjoy this one somewhat.

Otherwise, you might want to play something not based on a fifty-year old TV series, like The Legend Of Zelda or something.

Something good :P